After 115 years together, two giant turtles at an Austrian zoo are refusing to share their cage anymore, the Austrian Times reported Friday.  Well, you can't say they didn't try.

According to the paper, zoo staff realized something was amiss when Bibi, the female, bit off a chunk of her partner's shell. When the attacks continued, Poldi, the male, was moved to another cage. The turtles  have lived for the last 36 years at the Klagenfurt-based zoo.

Animal experts attempted couples' counseling by encouraging them to play games together and using turtles aphrodisiacs. But so far, efforts have failed to bring the shelled lovers back together.

I blame Bibi for all this, probably dating a younger, richer Alabama Map Turtle or a Red-eared Slider on the side, poor Poldi had no idea this was going on behind his...shell.

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